Everyone You Hold

Everyone you hold
takes a piece of you away;
everyone you know
pricks the image of the human clay
and everybody's laughing -
the joke goes mouth to mouth and slips away.

Everyone you hold
leaves you something of themself;
everyone you told
spreads your secret on the warehouse shelf
and everybody buys it
for everyone's in commerce and in trade.

When every sweet embrace has faded
the voices dip, the faces dim and memory drifts away -
still you stay in everyone you hold.

Everyone you hold
no, they never leave your side;
everybody knows
there are secrets we can't hope to hide.
If everyone is with you
then you can never be alone at all
and everyone forgives you -
accumulated whispers, Chinese walls.

Now everyone you knew
with smiles that you've seen through
is waving distant semaphore:
we flag, it's true....

But you're still in everyone you hold.

Everyone you hold,
everyone you hold,
everyone you told
 knows.

Personality

Not the same,
we are changed and we are changing still;
I've been waiting for the beans to spill.
If the truth be told all the plots will unfold:
we've as many lives as we have friends or acquaintances,
we're all only fractions of a whole.

Self-belief
glues together personality;
well-accomplished in all vanity,
in a life-long dream the consciousnesses stream
through as many lives as this: all the voices in our heads.

My brother's keeper
under no lock or key
will you always look out for me?

I don't remember, I don't remember,
I don't remember the names,
the essential's familiar, the personality's under change....

Through your eyes
I can see reflections of my own,
I feel I'm losing sight of all I've known
and I'm spiralling down, in the gene-pool drowned....
Truth is buried deep and just as well:
we've as many lives as lies we tell,
all the seld-taught fragments of fractured personalities.

I don't remember your name.

Nothing Comes

Consternation out of the box
as the conversation runs onto the rocks;
in full expectation nothing comes as a shock.

It's all plain sailing in the dry dock;
it's all downhill from here, in the rubble, taking stock...
with no sense of feeling nothing comes as a shock.

You remind me of the girlfriend I never had:
never fitted the equation, I was never quite one of the lads.
Still I remember that my feelings were always touch and go
once I thought I knew all that, now I just don't know.

The wrap's about to happen, the scene is already blocked,
black-out's already plotted and the cameras are locked:
when everything's over nothing comes as a shock.

I remember that my feelings were always touch and go
once I thought I knew it all, now I just don't know.

From The Safe House

This is not the final call,
and this is not a ghostly guide
and these are not the words for which we've waited;
still we're glued to the headsets
while the world's collapsed outside....
is it all really over now?
It doesn't matter if no-one else will hear.
Now you can say what you want, all outspoken.
Oh no, it doesn't matter,
no-one can get near us now...
so we can send in clear.

The storm cloud's broken and the old rule's fallen down;
the winds of history whip us naked.
Nothing's familiar on the streets of the old town
and chaos is the currency.
It doesn't matter if no-one else can hear us now...
It's time to send in clear,
 send in clear.
 Here in the Safe House,
 fear in the Safe House

No messages for coding,
no sense in subterfuge...all hope's in flight,
but here we are and here it's ending.
Last secrets to be whispered and the dying of the light
are all that we have left now.
It doesn't matter if no-one else can hear,
now we can say what we want, all is open.
At least it doesn't matter, no-one can get near us now...
It's time to send in clear.
 Here in the Safe House...
 all clear
And they're coming for you now, if you're ready or you're not
and they're coming for you now - are you ready?
No, you're not and they're here.

Phosphorescence

Across the ocean of the night
you turn and look into my eyes,
burn into my life.
Now the moment's magical
but we keep our silence

You could tell me anything you want,
you could tell me all your secret wishes;
only in our eyes, only in our eyes
we made the soul kiss
and we will never pass this way again
we will never know each other better;
ships pass in the night
and in their wake they leave just phosphorescence.

You could tell me any lies you want,
it wouldn't change the way I feel about this;
only in our eyes, only in our eyes
we made the soul kiss
and we will never pass this way again
but we'll always feel each other's presence...
ships pass in the night
and when we wake we're left with phosphorescence

Falling Open

I see
what isn't there and what might be:
all the pages falling open.

Out of my grasp
the future floods my fingers:
the blood that binds the bone
for us a given, unforgiving known.
 All I've known unknowing
Although I'm stumbling onward on the words
The script is always clasped
within my hand, encrypted.
 now I see...
A loosening grip,
a palm asweat from clenching...
the binding's ripped, leaves fluttering to the floor.

The book slips through my fingers,
all the pages falling open.

Bubble

Let's begin at the top:
there's no reason to think that this will ever stop,
so let's go back and start again;
in this finite uncertainty we'll circle round and then
sail a craft of self-conviction
across tomorrow-never-knows
where the surface stays unruffled
while the coral clusters quietly down below.

Cutting figures of pride and will
like Leonardo cartoons
we go flying formation in our hot-air speech balloons.

Can't go back, can't reverse...
no-one here really quite believes
the bubble's going to,
the bubble's going to,
the bubble's going to burst.

I fell off the raft of self-assurance
into undertow that sucked me dry and deep;
bent double by thought bubbles flooding through my blood
I surfaced from a lifetime's worth of sleep.
I remember once I gave myself the lecture,
swore on life as both a blessing and a curse
but all solid faith seems nothing but conjecture
now the bubble's going to,
bubble's going to,
bubble's going to,
bubble's going to burst.

And our bones become the coral of the future
and we slake the life-long thirst;
with a pin-prick, on a reef like a razor,
the bubble's going to burst.

The bubble's sure to burst.

Can Do

When you're fingered by self-doubt, my dear,
no-one is innocent or guilty.
Chained, your reaction when you're on the spot:
the flower of faith is wilting.
But if there's something that you've left behind
there'll be something else upcoming...
make what you will, the future happens;
now this is something that you just won't find till later.

No disillusion or despair will be defeat,
no simple disappointment should stay you
get up upon your feet,
stand up: life is sweet
with will we'll all shine through...
 Don't you ever give up on me
 I will never give up on you
 Don't you ever say "Can't", till you try you don't know quite what you
 Can do
can do,
can do.

When the long wave of the future breaks
we're all transmitters and receivers,
babes, and we're swaddled in the changeling room.
If this is nothing less than mystic
and yet something more than strange
still there's nothing worth remembering for tomorrow you could ever change...
I think you got it,
I think you got it,
it's in the pocket.

You know your place, you know your name, you got your slot,
you got the strength to be exactly what you want to.
With faith in faith intact,
time to test the given facts:
when we wake we'll be made brand new
and I'll be there right beside you.
I believe in time we'll all shine through...
 Don't you ever give up on me
 I will never give up on you
 Don't you ever say "Can't", if you know that's not true
 Don't you ever say "Won't", when you know you'll pull through
 Don't you ever say "Can't", till you try you don't know what you
 Can do.
Can do,
can do.
Don't you say you can't do it; till you try you don't know what you can do.
You say you can't do it - says who?

Tenderness

Nothing I can say, but this much I can do:
if you want I'll stay and be with you.
Just let the tears flood down and, yes,
 I can offer you tenderness.

What is gone is gone, it can be no more,
so we must move along and close the door.
I'm not his match, this I confess -
 but still I offer you tenderness.
 No more, no less:
 I can offer you tenderness.

He'll stay with you, I know...
now's the time to remember and let go.

Life will turn around though now it's growing dim,
although you feel the light's gone out with him.
Cry out all your tears, you loved him best -
 still I offer you tenderness,
 no more, no less;
 deep in your distress
 I'm here to offer some tenderness.
 I'm here to offer you tenderness.
 All I can offer's tenderness.

Remember and let go.

Recorded, mixed and mastered at Terra Incognita.
Bath April 1995 - June 1997.
Produced by Peter Hammill